A jumbled mess of thoughts!

I'm excited to be here for Day 2 - which is actually my third day IN A ROW blogging - and I have no idea what to write about. I thought about something on the way home, and it was particularly brilliant, and now I have no idea what it even was.

I took my two boys out to see Tangled - which was a decent movie, cute, not any vulgar language that I really noticed, and the characters remained fully clothed - which is a huge deal to me. I truly believe it is my duty to protect my boys' minds from sexual imagery that will leaving a lasting imprint on their brains. I feel like I fight this fight alone, but it's worth it to me. I want them to respect women, and especially their wives, in a counter culteral way! I want this respect to include their young lives, and the things they see with their eyes, hear with their ears, and speak about. I want them to understand that the damage done by sexual immorality isn't just done to themselves. It affects their relationships - and especially their relationship with their wife.

Now, I understand, my boys are very young, and they aren't getting married anytime soon - but this is when it starts. This is when it has to be important, or it never will be.

As I'm writing this, my oldest is reading his Bible, and my youngest is "reading" 365 Bible stories for bedtime. I feel a huge sense of peace about this, and I'm watching them, and thinking I should get out my Bible too, it's about time for a good, truthful life-shaping story that will grow me into the Mom they need me to be...the Mom that God is calling me to be...

Defining Failure

As I'm mid way through another long week, I'm beginning to wonder how to define failure. Should it be defined by the things my kids are not exceling at? Work performance? Home life? A failed marriage? I'm thinking that as it stands, I don't measure up right now. I'm looking around and my kids are struggling, we get so little time at home that the couple hours in the evening just whiz by like they aren't really there, and most of you know by now that I am divorced. Work performance is going alright, I've taken on several roles and I'm maintaining for the time being. I suppose I'm paying my bills and buying groceries. Which is no small feat in this economy, but it just doesn't seem like success compared to all of the things going wrong. I'm trying my best, but that doesn't seem like enough. I keep praying for God's help, but I'm not any good at waiting, I need things to be resolved yesterday, and it's just not happening that way. I know God's timing is perfect and all, but it seems like my little boat is about to capsize in this storm....I suppose God's just stretching me. I suppose the good days where it looked like things were leveling out were just a chance to recooperate before another trying time. I'm no closer to figuring out how to define failure or success, and I don't have any more answers about how things will work out. I do know that God is looking out for us, and I think I'm a little more prepared to wait on the Lord after writing this.