Monday, January 10, 2011

Trust....

Today I revise my statement that the biggest lesson is life being what we make it. God is calling me to trust.

He called me to trust Him with my health, which as we know He came through. He brought me through an amazingly hard ordeal, and He is healing my body more and more every day. A week ago today I was NOT breathing on my own - there was a tube in my throat, pumping air into my lungs for me because I just couldn't do it on my own. Praise God for the technology, then for the fact that I survived the technology, and am at home a week later, blogging, sitting on my couch, recovering.

He called me to trust Him with my new year. MY NEW YEAR. The one I had big plans for. The one that I was organizing, arranging, planning for. He stopped my plans, changed my focus, and asked me to trust Him for the coming year.
He also taught me the value of a day....in the course of a week. He is really working in my an understanding of not knowing how many days we have, and how much we are blessed to accomplish in a day. We have so many opportunities to serve and love, every day, and God doesn't want us to miss those because we are planning for a year.

He called me to trust Him with my children. I've been at attachment parenting, baby wearing, my kids never leave me, kind of Mom most of my life as a mom. The boys never go anywhere, other than when they were going to visit Stacy, which was hard. I didn't like having them somewhere other than home, ever. Guess what? God took such good care of my boys. He used wonderfully loving people to do so, and my boys felt all the love in the world as they spent a week with their Pop & Grandma. Talk about a huge lesson, and God put my heart at ease and I am thankful for the help and love shown for my boys!

Now it's money. I feel like it's all going to come crashing in as we run out of the money we already had. I expected Stacy go back to work today and he didn't. I don't want to start loosing things because I got sick. I feel so bad for getting so sick and I feel like it's going to mess everything up. I don't want to make late payments. God keeps saying Trust me, and I keep pointing at the mess on my screen saying "BUT WE DON'T HAVE THAT!!" and sure, money came from thin air, and there was cash in my wallet that Stacy spent. I know God put that there. But somehow that seems different then all the bills getting paid this month. It's not really. So God is calling me to trust Him so more, and this afternoon I'm sitting here at my computer, being honest with you and telling you, this is hard. I made a choice today though, I paid the tithes instead of saving that money for a bill, and I expect that God will do a miracle with that money. He will touch someones life, He will bless them, and He will do a miracle. and I was obedient.

Thank you God for these lessons in trust....give me the strength I need to trust You each day, with each and every thing (good or bad) that I face.

1 comment:

  1. It is easy to trust God with the things that we "assign" Him to handle. It is easy to take up our self appointed responsibilities and do what we believe to be the "right" thing. I just know that I spent 5 days with God telling me to trust Him- and you are at home, fairly healthy and I could not have done that for you. God is still telling me to trust Him- altho I am struggling with what He wants to handle- as for you I see it clearly! Trust Him with your debt- He knows your needs. Now maybe you can help me with the beam in my own eye!
    Love,
    Mom

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